Wednesday, April 15, 2009

On being British

Funny lot, us Brits. A multi-cultural society without a culture. There's no such thing a a British culture, in spite of the "we're losing our cultural identity" moaning of the right-wing newspapers. There isn't really a English culture either. There's a Welsh culture and a Scottish culture and several different Northern Irish cultures depending on your religious or political background. We're part of Europe - but we're not, not in our heart-of-hearts. We're no longer a force to be reckoned with in the world - but we cling to our past glories and our imperial history. We once owned half of creation and we still own a few small bits of it. We're proud of that - but ashamed as well. And nobody out there can hate us half as much as we do. United Kingdom?? Only against outsiders. Just ask any Taff or Jock what they think of the Sassenachs!! (Sorry - to my shame I don't know if the Welsh have a nickname for us - apart from "stupid English b****ds" that is). We taught the world to speak an obscure little Teutonic dialect - and most of them don't speak it quite the way we do - a goodly portion of them speak it better. We taught most of the world to play a bunch of sports (football, cricket, rugby) just so we could watch them humiliate us every time we play them. (Afghanistan just beat Scotland in the cricket and let's not talk about the Ashes...though the England women seem to do all right).

And the little quirks we have... I buy my petrol (gasoline) in litres but drive for miles. I buy my food by the kilo, my milk by the litre but my beer by the pint. I buy wood by the metre - but today I unloaded a bunch of 2 metre long bits of 2inch by 1inch timber. I measure a room in square metres to calculate wallpaper - but my allotment is measured in rods!!

Funny lot, us Brits.

Ze


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